top of page
  • Writer's pictureStrictly Films

Weekly Roundup Episode 52: Ketchup Packet Shortage

Welcome to another edition of Weekly Roundup! Man the topics at hand have been extremely serious these past few weekly roundups. I feel we need to ease up on all the seriousness and ranting, let our guard down and let loose. So by doing so, I wanna talk about a serious issue: The Ketchup Packet Shortage.

It has been reported that due to increase takeout orders cause by the global pandemic, has resulted in a nationwide shortage of ketchup packets at restaurants, fast food chains, and even Movie Theaters.

I’ve always been a ketchup guy, I’ll always take ketchup over mustard because let’s all be clear: Mustard is disgusting. Cheeseburgers, Hot Dogs, and Polish Sausage more than often must require ketchup in order to be satisfying. I used to only use ketchup for fries if they aren’t top notch, can’t imagine putting ketchup on McDonalds fries that’s a crime within itself. But as of lately... Even some top notch fries, I’ve been getting back to the ketchup groove as of lately, still no ketchup on McDonalds fries but hey how I’ve evolved in the ketchup game regarding fries has been new to me.

When it comes to this Ketchup Packet Shortage at hand, there are actually useful ways in order to solve the solution at hand believe it or not.

The first solution at hand and this is a no brainer to me: Eliminate Hot Dogs Served in Movie Theaters. The number one rule I’ve always had in life is to never order a Hot Dog at a movie theater, it was self taught to me ever since I was a child. Why?! Hot Dogs don’t belong in a Movie Theater. In fact I would argue that any hot foods don’t belong as well. When you think of movie theaters you think of PopCorn, Drinks, and Candy, as it all meshes well within the theater experience. When it comes to Movie Theaters you don’t think of Boneless Wings, Burgers, Chicken Samosas... Those were meant for dining, not partaking a movie while sitting in a dark space. Hot Dogs don’t belong in theaters due to quality.... How often are you going to get a quality Hot Dog, that has been rolling around in that Hot Dog roller for hours, placed on top of a stale bun?! That’s why I never get one, I already know it’s going to be awful, so why damage my mouth and insides?!

People cry and complain about popcorn prices, however it can be easily justified because it was made from scratch and made from the finest ingredients in an ole fashion popper you can’t get anywhere else. Plus you can not get quality movie theater popcorn anywhere else as well, you can make false claims how microwave popcorn is just as good, but we all know you’re fronting on the down low. Why don’t people cry and complain about movie theater hot dog prices?! You’re getting the low quality standard of buns and dogs, sure Nathans is not a bad brand but it’s not great and you can get Nathans Hot Dogs anywhere. On top of that: You have to pay $5 for one hot dog... $5 for one hot dog that is in poor quality, where you can buy a whole package of hot dogs and even fresh buns for maybe a dollar or two more?! I’ve been called Crazy for the fact I’m against hot dogs in movie theaters, but the only thing crazy is the fact you people have the idea of buying a hot dog in a movie theater, when the facts are there. Eliminate Hot Dogs in Movie Theaters, as your Ketchup Packet Shortage will revive itself.

Another Solution is Catering Towards Fast Food Workers and Even Restaurants for Takeouts: Hand Outs.

The Fast Food Chain Sonic is a great example. While Sonic is a pretty decent place to consume Corn Dogs and Desserts, what Sonic is not decent at is handing out condiments. Sonic Workers hand out about 30 Condiment Packages of Ketchup, Mustard, and Mayo. Now tell me... Why would I need 10 packets of each condiment, for two Corn Dogs?! Not only that: I never ask for condiments ever when I go to fast food places, but they just give it to me anyways. Restaurants have the tendency to do the same thing as well, they hand out way too many condiments when the order is particularly manageable for a couple condiments.

I understand generosity is the key to a successful business and we all appreciate generosity, but no one wants 5,000 condiments for a meal, that’s overly generous and extremely unnecessary as you’re just wasting condiments. In fact do you know where those extra condiments not needed go?! Either in the trash where they won’t ever be used or if you’re someone like me who hates the idea of waste, collected in a small baggy stored in a fridge for months, where they eventually end up in the trash anyways because my bottle of ketchup is better in quality and more convenient to use, than opening up a packet where ketchup is likely to get on my hands.

So Fast Food and Restaurant Workers: Tone it down with the handouts. Either ask the customer if they would like any condiments and ask how many, it maybe a pain in the ass but hey it’s less of a pain in the ass than wasting all those condiments causing a shortage. Or you can be logical and just hand out a couple... I don’t know man it’s just common sense.

I hope I solved the solution to your Ketchup Packet Shortage problem today. As always: Say No to Hot Dogs in Theaters and Say Yes to Popcorn in Theaters... Let’s talk about movies!

Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar Grade: B-

Supposedly Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar was going to be a late summer bloomer, for an end of July release last year. But of course due to the pain in the ass, it got pushed back and it eventually resulted in a premium V.O.D. release. At the time I didn’t care due to the fact this looked pretty bad from the movie posters and the teaser trailer. Was never going to spend $20 to watch this, as I got to watch it for free on RedBox thanks to my membership points.

Well I gotta tell ya: I was kind of surprise with Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar. This film could’ve easily fit into the goofy ridiculous vibe of the Austin Powers Movies, it’s actually quite shocking just how similar the two are. Sure Barb and Star are not special secret agents, however Barb and Star like Austin Powers are two goof balls, dealing with an evil genius, surrounded by a grand variety of colors... These two would be perfect for a double feature at home.

Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar is an extremely ridiculous film, there are many moments in which you’re quite baffled by what goes on in this film, especially the random skits and the very random musical numbers. The thing is the ridiculousness in this film actually works, somehow they provide you genuine laugh out moments in which you know what is going on is pretty stupid, but the film is self aware that it’s not serious within itself.

Kristen Wig and Annie Mumolo executed delightful performances, solid chemistry, and even brought us a round of laughs I wasn’t expecting, since Kristen Wig has fell off in recent years towards her comedic chops has gotten stale, but she revives them in this film. Jamie Dornan took me by surprise, as it almost felt like I was watching a parody of Collin Farrell in a comedic setting, quite a solid bizarre performance from him as well. Lovely Cinematography, I thought visually the film was absolutely stunning with so many beautiful colors in this beautiful setting in Florida. This film surprisingly enough would’ve been better suited in a theater, especially joining in laughter in togetherness with your fellow audience.

Overall, Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar was actually a solid comedy film. I recommend checking this one out.

The Spongebob Movie: Sponge On the Run Grade: B-

First things first: Revive Mid-Life Crustacean... The fact this iconic classic episode has been removed, due to a bunch of wimps on the internet, who don’t have a life outside of that phone/computer screen is total absurdity. There is nothing wrong with Mid-Life Crustacean and at no point does that episode inspire young kids to do such a thing Mr. Krabs and the gang does, in fact it hasn’t happen for decades since the episode was created so why would it happen now? In fact at the end of the episode Mr. Krabs is punished due to going inside of his mother’s panty drawer, so it actually teaches kids to not do such a thing or be face with punishment. Hopefully the artists whom put in a great amount of time in that episode, will get that episode revived again where it rightfully belongs. Now onto this new Spongebob film.

I was destined to enjoy The Spongebob Movie : Sponge On the Run in theaters, unfortunately the pain in the ass made this film into a selling point for a new streaming service Paramount Plus formerly known as CBS All Access. The Spongebob Movie: Sponge On the Run was debuted on launch day and what do you know?! I actually got Paramount Plus because of it. I paid a year in advance since it cost roughly $30 if you pre order it, which is $10 more than the rental fee of this film... That’s a steal in my book, you get the Spongebob Movie and get a year of this streaming service with tons of films and shows for ten dollars extra.

I kind of feared about the animation due to the fact they were going all out 3-D style, instead of the traditional 2-D. But the animation in this film turned out to be very impressive, as this was a gorgeous looking film, as the animation style has truly improved over the years when Spongebob first started to try this style. Great attention to detail regarding character design, especially how realistic Sandy’s fur looks.

As far as this film... Still enjoyable, however I would say this is easily the worst of the three films. What’s odd is the fact this film from a narrative perspective, can feel as if it was taken from some elements of both previous films and some past Spongebob episodes as well. Of course one episode came in mind was when Gary went Missing, the first film dealing with Spongebob and Patrick going on an epic long road trip featuring an aquatic Greek God presence while Plankton being the culprit of the crime, and the second film due to the absurd ridiculousness featuring such bizarre sequences.

While the narrative feels familiar to past films and episodes, I also did not enjoy the Camp Coral stuff at all, as it felt unnecessary and kind of random. It also doesn’t help the fact that Spongebob did not first meet Sandy Cheeks at Camp Coral, it has already been established within the first episode that Spongebob met Sandy while battling a Clam... Everyone who has seen Spongebob knows that already, so that scene was absolutely pointless to use. A closing argument why they would falsely claim Spongebob met Sandy, could be due to the fact they’re about to ban the first episode, due to inspiring young viewers to partake in animal cruelty... I wouldn’t be surprised, since everyone is stupid these days. The film at least did it’s job, creating enjoyment for an hour and a half, as you reminiscent on the good times within your beloved cartoon show.

Overall, The Spongebob Movie: Sponge on the Run was fairly decent. I recommend this film, don’t expect fireworks from it, just expect a nice quick good time.

Coming 2 America Grade: D

Craig Brewer is honestly a fairly underrated film maker. He’s made a couple underrated gems with Hustle and Flow and Blake Snake Moan, followed by a great original Netflix film Dolemite is My Name which has revived Eddie Murphy’s career into the modern day age of cinema.

I was looking forward to Coming 2 America, since I really enjoyed the first film. I’ve never seen Craig Brewer’s remake of Footloose, although it wasn’t received as well as his original films. That would make a lot sense, because I found Coming 2 America a major disappointment and honestly an extremely baffling useless sequel.

Other than the barber shop sequences and maybe two more chuckles here and there: The comedy material in this film flat out STINKS! They reuse the same exact comedic sequences word for word from the past film, into this new film as I question how lazy can you possibly be?! Yes it worked very well the first film, but you can’t just copy and paste it again thinking it’ll be as effective as the first time, we’ve heard the jokes before so it can’t possibly be any effective. But the new jokes are just terrible, modern day stupid social media slang jokes that nobody likes, including “On Fleek” which that term has been old about a decade ago, many comedic sequences are also obnoxious especially that dumb rap number which confused basically everyone who watched this film.

What bothers me the most about this film, is the character arcs. You can make an argument that Lavelle’s (Jermaine Fowler) character arc was kind of established, as instead of being a selfish money driven being, he learns to be a stronger being and more independent driven instead of just chasing a bag, and learns to love a woman by personality and not just for looks. Sure he may have changed over the course of the film, however it felt very half assed, wasn’t fully developed the way it should be, and the whole romance interest was pretty rushed and flat out lousy. The main issue is clearly on King Akeem (Eddie Murphy), his whole issue is he needs to be a stronger king to protect his community and people, so he won’t be easily assassinated by the other tribe. Sure King Akeem remembered to be more compassionate like he once was, however King Akeem did not become a stronger king over the course of the film, in fact he doesn’t change at all so how the hell is he going to prevent assassination from happening?! No Spoilers, but I guess because the Kings people helped scared the antagonist away while King Akeem was away, that means that King Akeem is now a more fierce intimidating king?! HUH?!

I want to personally thank Amazon for pulling this film out of theaters, no one should have to suffer another dope film be entirely butchered. It also doesn’t help that this film ever so often, replays clips from the original film... We had a scene in which they replayed the important elements of the first film, like we didn’t watch the first film in the first place... God Forbid!

Overall, Coming 2 America STINKS! I don’t recommend this film at all, go ahead and watch Craig Brewers past original films, at least those film were actually good unlike this load of crap.

Bad Trip Grade: B

Bad Trip falls within the lines of Bad Grandpa, where there is partially a narrative, but the main source of entertainment is the absurd comedic gags involving some stunt work, as you see real life reactions from real people that have no idea the occurrences happening is entirely fake. Bad Grandpa was enjoyably fine, however I didn’t particularly like the fact it kept cutting away from the narrative, as they do the ridiculous stunts.

With Bad Trip what it does better than Bad Grandpa, it never cuts away from the comedic gags alone, it keeps the narrative moving while executing the gags at the same time. Here and there some comedic gags weren’t all that funny, more noticeably the drug trip out scene as that gag has gotten stale over the years, and some of the gross out humor involving the porta potty and the puking scenes especially. But for the most part the comedic gags were fairly consistent, as I had myself laughing out loud many times, which is rare for me at least.

The narrative within itself wasn’t anything special, however for this kind of film I actually thought the narrative was considerably engaging, entertaining, and a little bit thoughtful as far as standing up for yourself and life is too short to not go for what you want. Dope performances by Eric Andre, Lil Rel Howery, and I also thought Tiffany Haddish does redeem herself in this crazy role she partakes in.

Like Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar: I wish Bad Trip was experience in a theater, with a crowd that would’ve certainly lost it in laughter with everyone. I’m just extremely happy Bad Trip was a major improvement on the past films such this type of genre, whether it be Bad Grandpa or the ever so stale Jack Ass films... This one maintains consistency within the gags, followed by maintaining a moving narrative without cutting away from the narrative itself, as it genuinely felt like a real movie.

Overall, Bad Trip was a solid film. I recommend checking this one out. As I finished Bad Trip, I’ve gotten news that my Cousin Melissa has now been engaged to her boyfriend Kevin. Congrats to Melissa and Kevin, Kevin will now jump to my 2nd favorite in-law just behind my brother in law Paul.... “You know you shouldn’t be ranking your in-laws, they should all be your favorites.” Sure, but then again ranking things is fun! The family has been waiting for Kevin to be officially apart of the family for years now, since he is the coolest kid on the block in the 716, happy for ya bud, hoping you come down to Tampa for the Bills game my G! -Mitch Smietana

4 views0 comments
Post: Blog2_Post
bottom of page